Nothing says “girl bonding” like a spa day. This time, I did the bonding with my flesh-and-blood girls.

My daughters are young — ages 4 and 7 — which might seem too young for such indulgence.

But in the middle of a family vacation to Cape Cod, Mommy liked the idea of visiting the Cape Codder Beach Resort and its Beach Plum Spa — with its specialty mother-daughter services.

The Beach Plum began catering to this crowd when it opened seven years ago. It now has two other locations with Kids Spa Menus at inns in Massachusetts. Statistics from the International Spa Association confirm the trend, showing 17 percent of U.S. spas offer packages for children under 13.

I don’t think of myself as one of these moms who treats her children as entitled equals. But this proved to be a great way to spend the day, even if it wasn’t cheap at $45 a pedicure.

I put on a plush spa robe and sipped an herbal tea. My girls didn’t fare quite as well; maybe they’re younger than the typical “daughter” clients — although I was assured they were not when making the reservations — but the best that could be done for a robe for 7-year-old Isabella was one of the strapless half-robes that women typically wear for facials. Little Ava just stayed in her T-shirt and skirt.

It seemed best to separate the two sisters if I were going to actually get any relaxing done, since when they were together, they were positively giddy. For our first treatments, I decided to take Ava with me for side-by-side, 50-minute massages, while Isabella had her toes done.

We went into the dimly lit massage room and nestled into preheated sheets on the massage tables. But at that moment when I should have let out a long sigh of relief, panic set in.

Would my always-on-the-go, constantly chattering daughter sit still for 50 minutes?! I couldn’t believe I hadn’t thought of that before we got to this point.

“Ava,” I reminded her, “you have to sit still.”

She giggled. Oh great, I thought.

But I need not have worried. Turns out, she can relax and be calm under the right conditions.

In the pedicure room, Isabella was finishing up her chocolate-themed treatment. The best part was the fizzy chocolate ball (a Me!-branded moisturizing ice-cream ball that’s catching on in the beauty business) that made the room smell good and her feet feel better.

Her freshly painted toenails were jazzed up with a faux-jeweled toe ring that she couldn’t wait to show off to her sister. She also noted — several times — that she sipped hot chocolate during the treatment.

That’s pampering.

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To live in San Francisco is to have access to the best of Northern California. For most of us situated along the bay, this means less than two hours to wine country, three hours to coastal destinations, and four hours to skiing. Indeed, some of the country’s most celebrated resorts are found within these regions, and they are worth visiting. What is less worth doing is braving traffic, and crowds, and (for those of us whose leisure time is at a premium) sacrificing the time it takes to get there. Though we hope for long, scenic drives that gently separate us from our day-to-day and ease us into our vacation, we often get crowded interstates and road-raged motorists, elevating us to an even higher level of stress.

What if short getaways could be different? What if we could find ways to get out of the city or go out of town without relinquishing numerous hours and shreds of our sanity just to get there and back? What if we could find peace and tranquility, luxury in service as well as aesthetics, culinary excellence, and world class spas right here in our own backyards? The Claremont Resort and Spa in Berkeley and The Lafayette Park Hotel and Spa are the only two resorts in the East Bay that guarantee that we can.

Both maintaining AAA Four Diamond status in 2009, these properties mix full service with quality. Each offers large, comfortable guest rooms with distinctive choices for views and other in-room features; each houses two restaurants—one for casual dining, the other for fine dining; each maintains elegant common spaces that implore guests to sit and relax; and their spa facilities—in many ways, the jewel of both resorts—are among the best in the Bay Area. Their similarities end, however, with overall look and feel. Whereas The Claremont appeals to one’s sense of grandeur, The Lafayette Park satisfies a desire for intimacy.

The Claremont Resort & Spa
Once the private residence of the Thornburg family, The Claremont was lost in a checker match to Frank Havens, who converted the property to a hotel in 1915. Its dignified perch on a mountainside in the Berkeley Hills—with dining areas, patios, spa windows and some guest room windows overlooking city, hills, and bay—bespeaks a sense of vastness. This aura of plenty is also carried in the array of activities available to guests—from tennis amid the palms at the immaculate racquet club, to swimming and exercise (including classes) at its state of the art fitness facility, to public events that include a jazz concert series and a diverse set of monthly workshops, to hours spent in its spa, the Claremont offers something for everyone.

The philosophy of the wildly popular Spa Claremont is to focus as much on wellness as on relaxation and to develop treatments that are aligned with the emerging needs of its customers. Consequently, its menu is continuously innovating to reflect some of the most exotic (e.g., the Tibetan Sound Massage) and relevant (e.g., The Majestic Hydrafacial) treatments available. Borrowing gratuitously from other cultures, the spa offers signature Brazilian, Philippine, Mayan, and Hawai’i an “Journeys” that provide hours of relaxation in the form of herbed baths, scrubs, and massages made with genuine ingredients from each region. Spa management has a long track record of commitment to authenticity, and employs some of the only legitimately-qualified Lomi Lomi massage practitioners in the Bay Area. It has also favored the use of natural and organic products for over a decade, well before such distinctions were en vogue.

Guests who enjoy “getting lost” will love The Claremont—whether the intention is to find solitude in a quiet space, or to blend into the backdrop of one of its well-visited restaurants, a sense of flow is easily achieved within its walls. Enjoying light fare and infused-vodka cocktails at Paragon or taking in the view and the live piano music over Sunday Brunch at Jordan’s seems to visibly put guests at ease (though, this may have something to do with the three hours of complimentary childcare included as part of the resort charge…)

Recommended: The Sunburn (Paragon cocktail), the Paragon Chip-wich (my favorite dessert in the bay area), the Rebalancer (Ayurvedic spa treatment), and the (very large) lap pool at the health club

The Lafayette Park Hotel & Spa
For those seeking a more intimate getaway, the smaller and uniquely constructed Lafayette Park Hotel and Spa is a venerable retreat. Built in the style of a French chateau by the Alden family-owned Woodside Hotel Group, the Lafayette Park Hotel combines comforts that the modern traveler has come to expect while integrating the old world luxury of classic hotels. A towering strength—its success in maintaining a sense of openness throughout—is realized via especially large guest rooms and restaurants and common areas that overlook pleasing outdoor scenes, effectively bringing the outside, inside.

One need only set foot in the lobby to experience the themes that characterize the entire hotel—large spaces flooded with natural light, European artwork and furnishings, fresh flowers and live plants, and books, books, books. Inside each guest room, and in various nooks and crannies throughout the property, is a well-maintained and diverse supply of reading material to be enjoyed at guests’ pleasure. Those looking to make the most of the fresh air and east bay sunshine may be drawn to settle in with a good read in the fountain courtyard or pool patio. Those who like to curl up by the fire have several hearths to choose from, and may request a guest room that features a wood-burning fireplace.

If connecting with friends and loved ones is a top priority for your getaway, the configuration of The Spa at The Lafayette Park is ideal. Unlike many other top-notch spas that offer superb, but separate, facilities for men and women, this spa allows the pool, Jacuzzi, sauna, and relaxation room facilities to be enjoyed jointly. Also, the fact that many of these features are outdoor-accessible makes the dynamic different from that of other spas. The adjacent fire pit, as well as the poolside cocktail and bistro menu, only allow for a wider range of choices for your spa experience.

While visiting The Spa at The Lafayette Park, be sure to appreciate its fidelity to proven treatments. I was pleasantly surprised to find both cranio-sacral and lymphatic drainage massage on their menu—these are two treatments that have been effective for me, but that I have seen come and go at other spas. Also notable is its extraordinary value—the $185 Mini Spa Day offers a 50-minute massage and a 50-minute facial, and is the spa’s most popular package. And, from now through May 31, 2009, spa guests may enjoy 20% off of any unbundled treatment.

Recommended: Espresso Martini (Bistro cocktail), the Alaskan Halibut Saltimbocca and Cedar-Planked Duck Breast (Duck Club entrees), and the Lymphatic Drainage Massage (spa treatment)

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The new Urban Yoga Spa at Fourth and Stewart is a contemporary Downtown sanctuary that combines upstairs spa services with a downstairs yoga practice. And while the spa may not have reinvented the wheel in terms of the services it offers, the selection is varied and includes some affordable express treatments.

Facials range from $45 for 30 minutes to $125 for 90 minutes; massages from $50 for 30 minutes to $120 for 90 minutes. Manicures are $25 to $30, and pedicures are $40 to $65; combine the two for $55. Waxing starts at $15 for lip, chin or jaw line, and tops out at $80 for a Brazilian. Eyelash extensions are $200 for a full set.

The spa also offers treatments for men and pregnant women, as well as one-and-a-half to five-hour packages ($120-$308).

With its stark white walls, cabinetry, and manicure and pedicure stations, the sleek spa acts as a kind of sensory deprivation chamber, isolating you from the hubbub of the city, which you can glimpse through large windows.

Urban Yoga Spa offers hot yoga, which can burn up to 1,000 calories per session. Classes are held in heated studios (95 to 105 degrees) and cost $18 each. Buy a five-class package ($80) and save $10, or a 10-class package and save $40.

One-month, three-month and annual packages are also available, as well as donation-based classes on Saturdays and Sundays, and a Karma Yogi program that allows patrons to clean the spa in exchange for free yoga classes.

The spa’s Raw program provides raw organic lunches ($12.50) Monday through Friday, prepared by local chef Adam Lewis. Lunches include such temptations as raw tacos, coconut noodle pad Thai and dark chocolate made with cacao, agave and a touch of vanilla. Lunch orders must be placed by 2 p.m. the day prior, at (206) 422-0222.

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Melanie Engle was trying to just pluck the stray hairs here and there. She was trying to deliver an age-appropriate eyebrow wax to her client. It was hard, though, because there was a foot tapping next to her, and a voice shouting in her ear: “No! Not like that — like a supermodel’s. I want them arched.”

After years in the beauty biz, Engle had seen her share of crazy ladies demanding perfect, Glamour-cover-worthy brows. But this Crazy Lady wasn’t talking about her own brows. The brows in question belonged to Crazy Lady’s daughter. Who was eight.

After sweating through the kid’s eyebrow wax, Engle, today an aesthetician at the Adolf Biecker Salon/Spa outposts in the Rittenhouse Hotel and Strafford — and, it should be noted, one of the most sought-after eyebrow specialists in the region — was directed to give her pint-size client a … bikini wax.

Engle was, predictably, extremely uncomfortable with the idea. But she sent the girl next door to the spa to have it done anyway. “It was clear that this girl was getting a bikini wax no matter what,” she says. “Better for her that we did it, instead of her mother dragging her off somewhere else to get it done.”

Engle is sharing this tale with me one afternoon over my own eyebrow session, after I’ve remarked on another young girl — no more than 10 or 11 years old — ­sitting nearby, thumbing through a magazine and obviously waiting for some sort of spa service. As Engle talks, my head floods with images of breaking this poor young munchkin out of the clutches of her surely nipped-and-tucked mother, to let her grow old and hairy under my prudish wing. “But … there’s nothing there, right?” I ask Engle. “I mean, at eight? Am I forgetting something?”

“Nope,” she says. “There’s not. Doesn’t matter. That’s when the mothers are starting them these days.”

OVER THE PAST few years, we’ve witnessed the swell of a luxury-class culture — you’ve seen it in these pages, manifested in reports of $80,000 “push presents,” lavish condo buildings sprouting up like beanstalks, and weekends spent stockpiling couture with on-call personal ­shoppers. But just when we thought this consumerist takeover couldn’t get any worse, here comes the trend’s newest tributary: The kids of the pampered are being taken along for the ride, without a backward glance at the childhood left behind.

“I’ve actually been joking that I’m going to write a book called Where Has All the Pubic Hair Gone?” Janice Hillman, a doctor in the Penn Health System at Radnor who specializes in adolescent medicine, tells me. “It’s such a rarity to find it these days in 10- and 12-year-old girls, and older girls. I need to check for it at that age — it’s an indicator of puberty and development, how much there is, where it’s growing. And now, I need to ask girls, if it’s not there, ‘Do you wax? Do you shave?’ Because so many of them do.”

Engle’s anecdote might be scary, but it’s not her only horror tale. She’s seen a pair of sisters — one nine, the other 10 — brought in for microdermabrasion. (Note: Microdermabrasion sloughs off dead cells to reveal glowing “younger” skin beneath. Which is awesome if you’re, say, 45.) And at Adolf Biecker, it’s normal to see 12-year-olds coming in for their first eyebrow jobs.

There you have it — the new norm for young, privileged, growing girls. It’s not just designer clothes, luxury cars, and the best-of-the-best in schools, lessons and tutors: It’s narcissism, and it’s inherited from — no, encouraged by — Mom. Mom, who not only lifts, tans and waxes herself into oblivion, but who has now turned her attentions to her daughter, hauling her from spa to spa before the school ­pictures or big dance, or, well, just because — for facial after blowout after wax. After a handful of appointments, the transformation from little girl to prepubescent supermodel is complete, thanks to beauty ­treatments that not long ago were reserved for big girls — with little consideration that the same beauty treatments meant to fix “imperfections” will probably screw the kids up down the road.

Lauren Albert, spa director at Rescue Rittenhouse Spa, says mothers frequently bring in their daughters between the ages of 10 and 14 for various waxes, nail services and facials; she’s booked more than one Sweet Sixteen spa ­extravaganza. Some moms even present their naked-faced ’tweens to Nives Riddle, Rescue’s award-winning and Vogue photo-shooting makeup artist
, for early lessons in makeup application — you know, lest they learn the tricks of eyeliner by haphazardly painting it on Elvira-style a few times. Moms are also setting up pre-bat mitzvah spa treatment series for their daughters. “It’s not just to get them ready for their big party,” says Albert. “It’s like, ‘Okay, you’re becoming a woman now, here are the things you’ll need to do as a woman.’”

Except, of course, they’re not women. This new, unstoppable desire of mothers to pluck and paint their daughters has created an unexpected conundrum for spa owners and aestheticians, who can’t afford to lose the moms’ lucrative business — but who also don’t want to be partners in crime. When moms book appointments to get their preteens waxed at Pierre & Carlo European Salon & Spa inside the Bellevue in Center City, owner Joseph Cutrufello makes it a point to run through with them exactly what will be happening to their child (read: pain, sweating, high ­probability of ensuing red bumps on young, sensitive, not-in-need-of-a-wax skin). At Bernard’s Salon & Day Spa in Cherry Hill, it wasn’t enough to simply suggest to moms that it’s not the best idea to apply harsh chemicals to the scalps and hair of their six-year-olds just to make their hair “more blond.” “We’ve flat-out told mothers that highlighting such a young girl’s hair is a bad idea, and something we’d rather not do,” says Carla Ciociola-Toppi, the spa’s marketing director. “But so many mothers push anyway that now we have them sign a waiver.” The waiver basically states that the spa prefers not to perform various services on children, that the mom understands this, and that she decrees it happen anyway. “It’s so weird,” says Ciociola-­Toppi. “It’s like they’re stage moms.”

In an effort to appease their ­consciences and avoid complicity, spa owners have gotten more creative, offering up palatable alternatives to moms intent on turning their daughters into eight-year-old Heidi Klums. Maurice Tannenbaum, who owns OMG Salon & Spa in Gladwyne, hawks an all-natural product to moms who want to lighten their five-year-olds’ locks; applied daily, it brings out subtle highlights. He has also drawn a line in his salon. “I had a mother once ask me to relax her 12-year-old daughter’s beautiful, wavy hair,” he says. “I just refused. I said absolutely not, that’s ridiculous, and turned her away.”

At the Phoenix Salon & Spa, on the bottom floor of the luxe Phoenix condo building in Center City, owner Sarah Keating finally drew up a waiver to deal with the constant influx of ’tweens (often the children of building residents) coming in — unaccompanied — for facials, highlights, waxes and massages. Some girls are in so often that they request specific spa employees. Keating recalls the day she informed one mother, who wanted to drop her 12-year-old off for a full body wax before a modeling casting call, that it wasn’t going to happen unless she, the mother, came in, signed a waiver, and sat with her daughter as any wayward hair that dared to grow on her adolescent skin — from head to toe — was ripped out.

Helping out your kid whose ­cosmetic/semi-medical problem is causing low self-esteem is respectable, as is spending time with her in ways other than loading up the shopping cart with mini-me Juicy. But somewhere along the line — well, the line gets crossed. We slip down the slope, and we’re back to seeing eight-year-olds waxing nothing but, um, skin, 10-year-olds requesting certain therapists for their Saturday-afternoon massages, and ­early-onset Botox.

“I do think, in some ways, this started as mothers and daughters spending time together, maybe getting their nails ­painted — but then it morphed into something else,” Hillman says. “A lot of times, these girls’ mothers have unresolved issues of their own — even perhaps an unresolved eating disorder — and are taking control over making some aspect of their daughter perfect. And then these issues transcend.” As beauty treatments become a habit, kids start to think this magazine-cover ideal is normal — and so is being pampered all the time. “Now, kids are asking for this stuff. It’s like a way of coping, an external support system,” Hillman says. “And it’s a huge problem.”

The Phoenix’s Keating, who sees nine-year-olds in her spa on a regular basis, says she’d refuse any spa-going request by her own nine-year-old daughter, save for nail-painting as a treat. Klein takes her almost-12-year-old daughter into spas for the occasional cleansing facial (“Good skin care is a habit, and I’d like her to learn that habit early”), but draws the line at other spa services (mommy-daughter manis excluded). “She has her whole life to do what she wants,” she says. “I want her to make those decisions about her body for herself, when she’s an adult. Plus, I know so many girls who go into debt in college trying to keep up with all of this — the spa treatments, the nice clothes. They feel like all this superficial B.S. is so important.”

And it’s not just an expensive spa habit young women are learning at the hands of their moms, Hillman says. “When you’re under the age of 16, change implies that something is wrong,” she says. “So you have to be very careful about the message you send to your kids. They need acceptance to build confidence, and when you’re bringing them in at a young age — ­especially when it comes to the bikini wax — you’re telling them that part of their pubescent bodies shouldn’t be there. And they think what mommy teaches is right.”

I remember something else. I was a senior in high school, writing papers for a string of AP classes, held hostage by the computer for so long that my shoulders and neck cramped, creating a constant, throbbing headache. My mom scheduled a series of intensive massages for me, in which the therapist both loosened my muscles and taught me ways to combat the grapefruit-sized knots, making writing my 1,500 words on FDR’s New Deal (virtually) painless. Until then, I had viewed ­massages as something only ­middle-aged people got, as a treat, to relax, to be pampered. But when my mom booked me, it wasn’t a treat; it was a lifesaver. And it made her a good mother. (Thanks, Mom!)

Which makes me hope there are other good moms who have found the happy medium. Maybe gentle facials for (emotionally and physically) scarring acne are a good idea. Maybe mini-mani birthday parties are just fun. Maybe moms can figure out a way to keep the bonding, and lose the creepy but-she’s-just-a-baby part. But for now, there’s backtracking to do if we want this happy medium to be the norm, not the exception. Consider Tannenbaum’s regular client at OMG, the one who schedules two blowouts per week — one for her, one for her six-year-old. “Oh, I don’t think it’s a treat,” he says. “This kid expects it. She expects her blowout.”

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Everyone loves a day of pampering at the spa, but let’s be honest: how many people really know how often to book a certain treatment? While it’s easy for me to recommend a particular facial or body wrap when asked by friends and family, when it comes to answering questions like the above, it’s best to ask a professional.

That’s why I went to Stephanie Doud, director of spa operations for The Spa at The Mirage, to get some answers. A professional in the spa industry for more than eight years, Doud has been at The Spa at The Mirage since July and worked before that at the Westin Casuarina just off the Strip. She helped answer all of my questions, from how often guests should book certain treatments to how they can make the most of their day at The Spa at The Mirage (which underwent a renovation 15 months ago, for those who haven’t been to Las Vegas in a while). She even answered the question I was almost too afraid to ask: is it possible to actually go to the spa too often?

Treatments: While Doud recommends getting a facial once a month, at the very least, she recommends guests get a facial with each change of season. “Your skin changes with each season, so it needs a refresher.” For pedicures, Doud recommends every four to six weeks, although “for women who wear open-toe shoes, it’s best to get a pedicure monthly.” She also recommends getting a manicure monthly “even if it’s without the polish” and a nice, full-body massage. For body wraps, she suggests booking them twice a year, and getting an exfoliating scrub seasonally.

How to make the most of your day at The Spa at The Mirage: “Arrive early. If you have a 9 a.m. appointment, try to arrive by 8 a.m. or at least 30 minutes before your appointment if you’re down to the wire. You want to give yourself time to relax. You don’t want your muscles to be all tight during your treatment from rushing [to your appointment]; you want to be unwound. Plus, then you’ll have time to visit the steam room and hot tub. Also, always shower before your treatment. We get so many people who come in straight from the pool with all their sunblock still on…by showering beforehand, you’ll be able to experience the products used during your service to their fullest.”

Must-try treatment at The Spa at The Mirage: “I would recommend any one of our body treatments. People are always amazed by how their skin feels afterwards–it glows!” Columnist’s note: The 80-minute Pear and Apple Facial and Body Treatment ($235) and the 50-minute Hot as Fire Wrap ($155) are both to-die-for!

What makes The Spa at The Mirage different from other Strip spas? “The one compliment we always get is, we’re in a hotel with 3,000 rooms, but our spa only has 17 treatment rooms. We’re very intimate, so guests get that one-on-one feeling. It feels like our staff is trained to read people’s minds, as they’re always anticipating a guest’s needs. Every spa on the Strip is beautiful, but for us, what makes us stand out is the level of intimacy we provide on such a large property.”

What’s the biggest misconception people have about going to the spa? “I would say a lot of people look at a day at the spa as a luxury. But now, especially in these challenging economic times, it’s really become a necessity. You really need to take care of yourself or else you won’t be able to take care of anything else in your life.”

Is there such a thing as going to the spa too often? “No, I don’t think so. I’ve been to different properties and I used to run a day spa that was attached to a fitness center, and we had people who would come in there every day. We knew their names, their kids’ names…I think if you can find a moment to relax, go ahead and do it.”

Finally, how can guests recreate their experience at The Spa at The Mirage from the comfort of their own homes? “If it’s in your price range, I would recommend taking home a piece of the spa with you, like picking up a good moisturizer. If you got a facial, find out what moisturizer was chosen by your aesthetician. Also, the body wash we have in our locker rooms is another big seller. You could also buy a nice scrub to scrub yourself with at home once a month. Or you can just do something simple, like lighting candles by your bathtub [to help you relax].”

The Spa at The Mirage is located next to the Kim Vo Salon and is open daily from 6:30 a.m. to 7 p.m. It offers plenty of amenities to help guests unwind, including a sauna, steam room, three cozy whirlpools and one cool whirlpool, as well as a menu of indulgent services featuring botanical elements meant to revive and rejuvenate.  Call 702-791-7472 to book your appointment

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MOUNT DORA – The historic Lakeside Inn is providing its guests with many new services, including bridal-party accommodations, yoga, health-conscious meals, diet coaching and spa treatments such as massages, facials and makeup artistry.

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Simplicity is the order of the day, economic stimulus plan or no. Cutting down extraneous costs and adopting a more introspective approach to your spending is the imminent result of the current financial debacle and the so-yesterday American raison d’être of mindless luxury. But getting mindful doesn’t mean giving up pampering. It just means trading in your regular ol’ day spa — debutantes, amenity-packed locker rooms, pretentious ‘tudes and all — for a place like Avra Organic Spa.

Avra, tucked away in a comfy alcove of an office building in Fisherman’s Wharf, touts itself as a green spa, which essentially boils down to “waste not, want not.” The ambience of the space is hip and urban without exuding glammy snobbery. That’s partly because lots of the stuff in the spa (like the wall hangings, flooring, and stylin’ crates used as tabletops for your spa cocktails) comes directly from recycled materials. Way to make “throw-aways” chic.

Avra offers everything from specialized detoxification programs (provided after a thorough consultation with the resident herbalist), botanical medicine (check out the reception-area shelves, which boast sustainably culled herbs for everything from sleep deprivation to menopause), to colon hydrotherapy, to beauty without cruelty through the spa’s customized organic skincare.

Given the “organic spa” moniker, you can definitely expect that Avra is more of a holistic wellness center than a one-stop shop for hedonism. In Avra’s words, “If we clear inner pollution, we will have the strength to cease creating outer pollution.” And considering the concomitant stress of economic hardship and overworked, fatigued minds and bodies, pinching pennies on stuff like Frapuccinos in order to fatten your budget for overall wellness is probably a good thing.

When I paid a visit to Avra, I tried out the spa’s herbal body wrap, a service that purports to help clients lose unwanted inches, reduce the appearance of cellulite and spider veins, reduce stress, increase metabolism, and detoxify the body while firming skin. I was already familiar with body wraps, a beautifying remedy that dates back to the time of the Egyptians.

Avra’s wraps — administered by a spa herbalist, who mummifies your body with tightly wrapped pieces of cloth dipped in herbal nutrients — are special, as their herbs are completely organic and primarily locally farmed. The process is fairly uncomfortable, though not painful. After you’re wrapped and outfitted in a nifty suit meant to keep you warm, you’re led to one of two dimly lit body wrap lounges, where you can lie back, cozy up in a blanket, get your feet rubbed, and fall asleep for the next hour or so. Every now and then, in between snoozing, I took sips of my kombucha elixir and nibbles of the spa’s delectable organic coconut chocolate. After a while, the discomfort of the tight bandages melted away and I was completely fixated on prolonging my relaxation.

Personally, I felt infinitely more relaxed after my 90-minutes were up, but I’m not sure if that was because of my naptime or the relief that stemmed from removing the bandages. My skin definitely felt softer, but I didn’t necessarily notice a difference in tone or inches. While some may recognize immediate results (a more contoured shape, glowing skin, looser jeans, etc.), a series of sessions over a few months is usually recommended, particularly since results like increased metabolism tend to improve with repetition. (Avra also offers a Sudatonic System wrap, which uses infrared technology in addition to organic creams to aid in the breakdown of fat.)

If you’re intrigued by the spa’s unique approach to inner beauty, you’ll also want to check out some of the other services. Avra clients, in particular, swear by the spa’s efficient approach to colon hydrotherapy. Granted, colonics certainly aren’t for everyone, and debate over the scientific credence of this system of internal irrigation is worth looking into before heading for the nearest enema. Water is filtered into the lower intestinal tract, assisting in the evacuation of waste, which is said to lead to a happier colon and attendant numerous benefits. Aside from its mega-draining action, getting a colonic also means better digestion and lymphatic function.

My favorite service at Avra was probably its “intuitive massage,” a technique in which the therapist uses a variety of modalities — craniosacral release, Reiki, acupressure, trigger point and Swedish, to name a few — combined with her own hunches about what your body needs. While the idea of an intuitive massage seemed a bit frou-frou to me, my own experience with talented energy workers didn’t leave too much room for scoffing.

My therapist Crystal — aside from having a gentle yet deep and precise touch — was able to identify issues in my body that I’d always suspected were there, but that few massage therapists, had ever pointed out to me before. The post-treatment session was equally helpful, as Crystal took the time to teach me a few stretches that would work to realign various parts of my body.

While I have a certain prejudice that precludes complete trust in “organic” (which can sometimes be a buzzword meant to pander to the masses), simply speaking with Avra’s knowledgeable specialists and attuning myself to the unostentatious vibe of the place helped mitigate some of those doubts. In any case, frazzled nerves and conscientious intentions (both mind/body and money/wallet) will find that Avra is the perfect retreat for some holistic TLC.

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Looking fit after a split

 Breaking up doesn’t mean looking bad

It is possible that a break up could be the best thing that ever happened to your body.

 My first job was a receptionist position at a big broadcaster. One of the most impressive women at the company was the head of the legal department. She was in her 40s, fitter than I was, and extremely confident. I never thought to question why she was that way until the day when one of my colleagues let me in on a secret. Before her divorce, she was 20 pounds heavier and a lot less happy. “The divorce was the best thing that ever happened to her,” my friend said.

I learned a valuable lesson that day. Firstly, divorces aren’t always the most devastating thing that can happen to a person, and secondly, it’s possible that a break up could be the best thing that ever happened to your body. Obviously, in a time of dire stress or grieving, the way you look isn’t always the first thing on your mind. But looking good makes you feel better and often, you look better when you’re taking care of yourself.

Get thee to a gym

Of course, this applies to everyone. And it is possible that the gym is already a part of everyday life for you. If it isn’t, though, make an extra effort to get there. Not only will you tone up for those hot nights out, working out is a proven stress-fighter and will keep you from getting sick. Other benefits: better sex with your lucky new beau and a time-filler, now that you’ve got a bit of a time void going.

Book a spa appointment

Immediately after you break up, call your best friend. Immediately after that, call the spa and book a series of embarrassingly indulgent spa treatments. That’s right, a massage, a facial, whirlpool bath, mani and pedi – basically, everything you can afford. Bonus points if your benefits cover the massage. That means you can spend more on the other treatments. If there’s one time when you need someone to pamper you, it’s now.

Maria, a 25-year-old database manager, always books herself into a spa after a break up. She thinks the world of going in and getting yourself cleaned up – for you.

“Even getting your bikini line done is a good feeling, even if no one’s going to see it,” Maria says.

Go to town and enjoy yourself. Get your best friend to join you. If she won’t, give me a call. I always need an excuse to go to the spa.

Don’t eat yourself out of house and home

Sometimes, when you think that the world can’t get any worse, that there’s no hope left for humanity, that civilization is crumbling beneath your feet, it’s easy to justify eating a whole tub of Häagen-Dazs. After you overeat a bit, stop, think about your health, and take it easy.

“I tend to overeat after a break up,” Daphne, a 23-year-old student, says, “But let’s face it – you don’t want to gain a lot of weight when you’re trying to hook up with someone new.”

Check out this story for some delicious pig-out foods that won’t leave you feeling like a complete glutton. If you’re one of those people who stop eating during difficult times, remember to eat some round meals here and there. Not getting the proper nutrients will leave you run down and sickly-looking.

Go through your wardrobe and edit

People usually need something drastic to happen to take a good look at their wardrobes and decide to make a change. Why not use your break up as a reflecting point? Were there clothes you wore especially for your ex? Get rid of those ones, they’ll just remind you of him (or her). Are there clothes that you wore because you were (be honest) fine with letting yourself go? Get rid of those, too. If they don’t look good, they’re out.

Once you’re done with the edit, go buy some new things that make you feel like a million bucks. Don’t confuse this suggestion with going out and actually spending a million bucks. A few good, well-tailored pieces are worth the ill-fitting clothes you just threw out. While you’re at it, get some new lingerie. Wearing pretty panties will make you feel sexier, whether anyone else will see them or not.

Do NOT get a new haircut

Common logic says, ‘Hey! I am a new woman! I’ve got new clothes! I’m going to the gym! Why don’t I drastically change my hair?’ Perhaps logic is the wrong word. Perhaps the correct word is mania. Of course you want to look great and do something different and show your ex that you’re extremely hot. But don’t jump into something without thinking it through first.

“I can’t tell you how many people I’ve known who went out and got a disastrous haircut after a break up,” says Maria. It’s true – at least give yourself a cooling off period before making a huge hair decision. And for goodness sake, consult five friends. Don’t say we didn’t warn you.

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